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Well, first off, the fine folks at dogchat.co.uk have identified what Shelby is composed of and, as previously thought, she has absolutely nothing to do with a Jack Russell. She is, in fact, mainly Patterdale Terrier with a chunk of Hunt Terrier thrown in for good measure. Good to know – as it certainly explains her “exuberance”.
Next in line is a concerted effort to try and get her to calm down a little around other dogs and to see just how obedient she is in general.
It seems that we’ve been doing things wrong with regards to other dogs by shortening the lead etc. as this can lead Shelby to think that we’re getting anxious about them and promoting her “defend the family” instincts (which, when added to her “destroy that dog” instinct is a recipe for disaster).
Instead, we should be chilling out at the sight of another dog, laughing gaily and employing cheese!
…… and the cheese is working.
I now carry a zip-loc bag of tiny cheese pieces with me when I take Shelby anywhere, and this is how it works;
At home, move away from her – to one side or behind – and call her name. When she looks round, magically present a piece of cheese to her but held in such a way that she has to look into your eyes to see the cheese. Rinse and repeat four or five times. Do this pretty frequently throughout the day.
Now, when out and about, whenever she does anything good sneakily take out a piece of cheese and call her name. Same thing applies – hold it so that she has to look into your eyes to see it and then let her have it.
If she does anything bad, then simply ignore it and then reward her when she comes back/ stops destoying etc.
Ultimately, she will expect a piece of cheese when you call her name and look directly at you – when outside. This means that, when you spot an alien dog, call her name and she will look at you. You then distract her with a piece of cheese.
Ultimately, ultimately – she will see an alien dog and then look straight at you, expecting the cheese.
The main things here are perserverance and ensuring that she doesn’t know that you have a bag of cheese in your pocket.
Early days yet, but I’ve got her to sit, stay, look and cross the road to order.
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There is only one item of clothing associated with the various asbos wandering the streets today, and there is only one style.
Introducing then, Shelby – Henley’s biggest asbo – in her Puchi Hoody.
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South Oxfordshire District Council – what a bunch of jobsworths.
Last Friday, I took the Shelbinator out for a walk when I got in – as Jenny has gym club. We plodded along Crisp Road and were approaching Hop Gardens when, bowling towards us, came a bloody great stray Bull Terrier. Well, Shelby being fearless launched into her usual attack routine and began to bite the dog- despite it being five times her size. Problem was, though, that Bull Terriers have the hide of a Rhino and the brains of an amoeba, so he just thought Shelby was having a game.
Down Crisp road it followed us – bouncing into me, hassling Shelbs and generally being a nightmare. Back along Luker Avenue and, for half an hour, I tried in vain to shake it off – even aiming the odd shoe in it’s direction. No use – everything and anything just bounced off his thick skull.
We finally got home and, with one hand holding the now ludicrously enraged Shelby and the other trying to hold back the stray, managed to bundle Shelby indoors. I put Shelby’s lead on the stray and dragged him up the road to let him go. Lovely. Back home, indoors and CRASH! Dork dog is now trying to break-in.
Back out, lead back on and tie him up to the Landrover.
I called the non-emergency police line and explained that I had a stray Bull Terrier that was trying to do an SPG job on the back-door. The nice copper gave me three numbers for South Oxforshire District Council (SODC) dog catcher and away he went.
First number – sorry we’re not in now.
Second number – “Tinkerbell” the speaking clock.
Third number – some poor soul who hadn’t got a clue what was going on.
Eventually said poor soul got me the number for SODC and I gave them a ring. Much pressing of buttons later, I’m through to their emergency number. When the dappy mare on the other end had finished laughing at a colleagues joke, she deigned to speak to me and I explained my predicament.
“Where do you live?”
“Henley-on-Thames.”
“Ah! Oh! Ah – that’s SOUTH Oxfordshire”
“I know, that’s why I’ve called SODC”
Well, get this. In SODC, you have to take the stray to the dog catcher – in Abingdon. Bloody easy dog catching job that must be then. I explained that we were dealing with half a ton of barking mad Bull Terrier and got the “It’s company policy” line. So I asked what I should do if it started attacking people.
“Well, then it’s a dangerous dog and you can call the police.”
“So I just have to sit here waiting for it to attack someone then do I?”
Companypolicycompanypolicycompanypolicy ……………..
“Do you want to come over and help me try and get this thing into a car and then drive it to the other side of Oxford?”
“If you want to complain, I suggest you call your district councillor on Monday.”
“And in the meantime, watch the dog demolish my house?”
Companypolicycompa…….SOD OFF
What a bunch of tossers.
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Sunday night and time for Shelby’s last stroll – and a chance to have my weekly chat with Mum. We wandered along Crisp Road, down Hop Gardens, along West Street and through the grounds of the hospital. No cats to chase and no dogs to attack – lovley.
Then down York Road and along Kings Road. As we crossed over Clarence Road there was an almighty explosion from behind us. I spun round expecting to see the remains of a house following a gas explosion in time to see a cloud of bricks and a solid iron inspection cover sailing into the night sky. Smoke billowed from a hole in the ground and subsequent explosions carried on. The road was also rather dark. I shone my torch at the crater and edged a bit closer (I never listened to the “ensure the area is safe” bit in the Emergency Responder course) to have a look in. Well blow me down if it isn’t the main electricity junction for the road – looking much worse for wear – and making noises as though it’s building up for an encore.
When the fire brigade arrived, the first word the chap uttered was “Fark!”
Ten seconds sooner and Shelby and I would have been stood on that and – at best – missing our limbs. Funny old thing life isn’t it.
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Here’e the deal – seventeen miles and nearly seven hundred metres of climb. Not only, but also, an average speed of nearly six mph. Click on the “View Larger Map” link to see the whole route. (I’ve just sussed that you can page through the steps of the route using the usual Google navigation.
View Larger Map
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Shelby, Shelby, Shelby – you little sod.
As you can probably guess from the image, Shelby has been in the dog-house this week. Utilising the cat-flap to the best of her ability, the neighbours phoned up lunchtime mid-week to let us know that she was sitting in the middle of the pavement contemplating the world and then, the next day, whilst Jules was in the kitchen, the Shelberator decided that she’d pop down the local park by herself.
Never fear though! I have employed an Enterprise solution to customise the cat-flap and all appears to be well for the moment.
Other than that, the site is now listed upon Stumbleupon and is really banging traffic in now – lovely, thank you.
It’s been a busy week – hence the update today and not more recently. I will, however, bung some more Ubuntu tips up in the next day or so – as the CTRL+ALT+DEL page is proving an absolute winner.
Not only, but also – for no particular reason – I’m going to add a to-do/to-want page for Atomic and, get this, I’m going to get my hair cut. Fantastic! I’m looking too much like cousin Devon at the moment.
Catch you soon!
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…. and it was time to break out the Swanni this morning. Minus three degrees and a beautiful clear (night) sky – in fact we saw a shooting star yesterday morning. Three days until I can order my Fenix, which will be a welcome relief from the somewhat feeble (although usable) Everready torch that I’m using at the moment.
I eBay’d the E2D – for a lot less that it was worth but, to be honest, does it make any sense getting through twenty quid’s worth of batteries a week!?
The Shelberator and I had a couple of monster plods over the weekend – eleven miles (avec Jenster) on Saturday morning, and then fifteen miles on Sunday. I’ll post a review of the GPS software that came in handy a little bit later.
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First off, the Bodyglove XT bluetooth headset. I changed the ear-holding bit from the “Extreme” rubberised loop to the supplied “normal” plastic clip and, I have to say, it now sits wonderfully in the ear and clamped to the side of my head. I did have a bit of a glitch with it the other night whilst talking to Denman but, other than that, I’ve got no complaints at all. In fact, it’s still running off it’s original charge.
Now to torches! I took Wensley’s no-brand single LED out with Shelby the other morning to see how it fared (after I told him how amazing my E2D was). It cost him a massive fourteen quid and, for the money, isn’t too bad. Expert that I am, I’m guessing about thirty lumens – it has a very wide throw and not a great range. It did, of course, have that lovely blue-white LED beam though.
It turns out, after ordering a spare bulb for the E2D, that it was the eBay batteries that were crap, so I bought a couple from Tesco (nearly ten bloody quid!) I took that out the next morning and, wow! It definitely p-d all over Wensley’s LED. The beam didn’t strike me as too yellow – good for an incandescent bulb, and the range was absolutely superb. Battery life of and hour and twenty though ……… hmmmmm.
So, I eBay’d the PSP that I never use (the E2D is on there too if you want it – plus two batteries and a spare bulb) and, once the money that I got has shifted out of PayPal, I’m getting a Fenix TK11, a re-chargeable AW18650 (that’s 2200Mah) battery and a quick recharger. All from Fenix, which means they’re all compatible. That will give me a grand total of 60 lumens for twelve hours per charge or 2.7 hours at 225 lumens. Lovely!
Other than all that. After six weeks, I’m finally getting fit. My right leg (at the risk of sounding like a dull orienteer) has almost stopped hurting in most places. Shelby’s not spending so much time at the end of her lead either.
I’ve also managed to pretty much fix the (latest) oil leak in Atomic. For reasons known only to itself, the dipstick sheath had sheared off inside the bolt holding it to the engine block. There appears to be no socket known to mankind to remove the thing so, after loads of trial and error, I found some kneadable steel (it’s called something else, but I can’t remember) and tried that to re-attached the sleeve to the block. First attempt failed – as I was trying to leave the bolt free for future use. On the assumption that, if I ever need to remove this un-removable bolt, then the engine’s probably buggered anyway, I used the rest of the steel to complete enshroud the base of the sleeve over the bolt and engine block.
It now appears to have stopped leaking!
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I’m going to talk about torches today – or flashlights, if you’re American.
Why? Because I’m walking Shelby in pitch black these mornings and today I fell arse over tit down a steep slope when I got tangled up in brambles.
I had already made provisions for the winter morning walks a few weeks back; As this is a daily occurence, I decided that a rechargeable light was going to be far more cost effective and got an EveryReady torch from Homebase that is now plugged happily into the utility room. It promises to stay alight for ninety minutes – more than enough for the four miles in the morning – and cost a mighty twelve quid.
I was there again a couple of weeks back buying a new garden gate and saw that they had rechargeable million candle-power lights on offer for seven quid, so picked up one of those too.
I charged that latter up – in the utility room again, if that makes any difference – and then left it turned on to see what I could expect.
Ten minutes. Ah.
That’s now been consigned to emergency use. I then had the opportunity to use the EverReady whilst doing some wiring in the loft last weekend and have to say that I was a little underwhelmed by it’s brightness. To be honest, it’s going to make as much difference in the dark of the Chiltern woods as a candle.
So, to my original trusty torch then – a Surefire E2D Executive Defender. This baby is a real torch – it fits in the palm of my hand and bangs out a mighty sixty lumens of light using two CR123A batteries. If you don’t know what that means, when shone in the eyes, it will temporarily blind you for five minutes. Nice.
The only problem with the Surefire, is that the two batteries will last a mighty one hour, twenty minutes. That could end up proving pretty costly. I therefore took a visit to eBay and grabbed a couple of rechargeable batteries and a charging unit.
Batteries charged, I popped them in the E2D and the bulb blew. Sod.
At this point, I’m a little stymied – was it the dodgy eBay batteries or the six year old bulb that caused the problem? I dug around the internet to look for a spare bulb unit and found one here – eighteen quid!
This brings me to a little digression; The Surefire is a “good ol” American product. Built to last and superbly constructed, it’s waterproof, shockproof, everything else proof and designed to last forever. Back in the day when I got it (cough over a hundred quid cough), there was nothing to surpass it. Since then, however, the Chinese have got in on the act (very subtle link there – take ten credits if you can work out it’s relevance).The Americans – like the French used to be – are pretty parochial when it comes to buying things. If it’s made in America then, whatever the price, it must be gosh-darn good. Us Brits are a little more canny now. The Chinese are lapping up all manner of consumer goods and the various reviews of what I’m about to mention sing volumes for what they can produce now.
In looking for the replacement bulb, I came across the Fenix TK10. My god what a light! Using LEDs – which would cost one hundred and thirty quid for my E2D. Yes, that’s right. £130 – this forty-seven quid baby also uses two CR123As but can bang out sixty lumens for ten hours or – get this – two-hundred and twenty-five lumens for the same time the E2D does sixty.
Two-hundred and twenty-five lumens. That is daylight. That is danger. Not only that, it throws the light two-hundred metres, is also waterproof, shock-proof, everything proof and fits in the palm of my hand too.
Sadly, I can’t justify getting another torch to Jules – I mean, sixty lumens is more than enough – so I’ve ordered the replacement bulb assembly for the E2D. There’s also the issue of permanently blinding Shelby – which wouldn’t be good. However, if the rechargeables manage to blow the replacement bulb on the E2D, then I’m going to be placing an order on the Fenix site.
Watch this space!
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Guess what? I’ve found a four-legged creature that Shelby doesn’t chase!
Fair enough, she had a little sniff round it – but no barking and savagery.
Other than that highlight, I’ve finally got round to fencing in the back-garden, so the place is Shelby proof now. It’s nice for her to be able to run around a bit without a lead on.
The Pikey/Gucci vs Shelby battle is calming down too now. Pikey can wander into the room (and does) when Shelby is in there, and there’s no hassle. Gucci kind-of does, but isn’t quite so keen as Pikey.
Pikey clearly considers Shelby a pleb, but we could have a happy family this time next month.
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